01

Where it all began…

  • Born to a single mama

  • Addicted father who was in prison most my life

  • Emotionally abusive sister who ended up with traumatic brain injury at 19 from a car accident

  • Moved 18 times before I was 16

  • Ended up in a religious cult that preyed on my vulnerabilities

  • Arranged my marriage at just 20 years old, & had me pregnant by 22!

So yes, the trauma was deep, but if I stayed seeing myself as the victim, I would never get free even though so much of which was out of my control.

However, I needed to find a way for ME to get free WITHIN. The fire in my belly wouldn’t let me stop until I figured it out. So this put me on a path of really trying to find my way to being whole & living a life aligned to my soul.

Facing my reality

 

My reality was WAY different from what I was dreaming up. I was only 26 in this photo.

  • Newly separated (got divorced a year later)

  • Single mama working as a bartender

  • No car, savings, bank account, & 30K in debt from school

  • Dependent on food stamps

  • Not sure about my purpose or direction in life.

    I was just trying to figure out how to survive.

02

My ideal day had me living in a warm location, with my own business, a stream in the back, a house I owned, and private cooking lessons with Chef Gordon Ramsey, HAHA!!

But that was NO WHERE NEAR MY LIFE😭 but that vision still mattered. My dreams still mattered. And they motivated & inspired every action I took. My vision was my filter & helped me get closer and closer to my actualized life.

03

Vision

  • IN 2009, I WROTE MY FIRST IDEAL DAY

  • THEN IN 2014, I MADE MY FIRST VISION BOARD

2014 was also the year I started therapy because I was being faced head on with myself & the patterns I kept seeing repeated in my life. This was a transformative year for me of owning my shit!

My ideal day + my vision board helped plant & nurture vivid seeds of myself & my life that served as guides over the years, even though it took me awhile to fully actualize my visions.

Practicing the path

I’ve been on this path for over 10 years. The road has been anything but linear, but I’ve learned that it’s less important to be “right” all the time and more important to “keep showing up”. I’ve learned that when you have a clear base about who you are, what you want, & what you value, staying aligned comes down to how we make the daily decisions in life vs. just “BIG” decisions.

The cumulative impact of daily decisions aligned to your values is far greater than just making one right decision that feels huge. In fact, the small day to day decisions make the bigger life moves possible.

And the more you do this, the more aligned you get. Your decisions get more refined. Your decision making quicker. Your courage stronger.

04

05

Imperfect action

It’s not about making perfect decisions. It’s not even about making right or wrong decisions. Instead, I like to think of it as making informed & aligned decisions and doing so takes time.

Even though I came to know more clearly what I did want, moving from where I was to where I wanted to be wasn’t always so clear. I had to remain steadfast on my path by consistently building that unwavering commitment to myself, no matter the unknowns.

This allowed me to progress towards actualizing my deep desires…I ended up being offered a job by one of my consulting clients which led to me becoming a CEO for the first time when I was just 32 and 5 weeks postpartum. However, the entire time I was at that job,I could never fully reconcile my decision for being there. And four months into being a CEO, I made the most wild decision yet…

Pursuing my dreams

It was the Christmas and I was 5 months postpartum, and expected to go back to work in a week. Even though I was proud of my accomplishment of becoming a CEO, making that coveted 6-figure salary, I didn’t want to go back.

Who I was and what I wanted did not feel in alignment and something I like to call my deeper knowing, my wild mama voice, wanted me to understand something. My soul knew something more was coming. And after heeding the call & deciding to book a trip to visit Hawai’i, just a week or so before leaving, things came to a head at my job and it was clear it was time for me to go.

So I resigned. And not only did we visit Hawai’i, but less than 3 months after I resigned, my partner, three kids and I moved to Oahu! Everything changed in what felt like a blink of an eye. Remember when I said that our daily decisions that we make culminate to make the BIG decisions even possible?

The decision to truly follow my gut and choose ME by quitting my job without any clue of what was next was simply another decision in my daily decision making habit. This is what an unwavering commitment to yourself looks like. I would have never gotten here had I not been showing up consistently for myself for the 9+ years before.

06

07

Whole self

Now that I am living in the reality that I dreamed of for myself and after 10+ years of navigating my journey of self-healing, I use what I have learned to help other mamas. At some point you gotta decide to heal, be whole, & live aligned to the energy of YOUR soul FOR YOU, first…and know that when you do that for yourself, everyone in your life will positively benefit in the end.

So I want to tell you right now, let my story be an inspiration to you. You’re allowed to be a whole, healed mother with dreams, visions, values that are yours, & a radical imagination that places you somewhere so far from your current reality. And you can actually have the audacity to not only believe you can attain it, but align your daily decisions and actions to make it happen!

I’ll even go as far as saying that we NEED you to do & be just that! Because when mothers heal, we all heal. Your healing, liberation, & joy is directly tied to mine…and mine yours. And ours together creates the radical possibility for our children to also heal & be free. This is the change we seek. This is the change we need.